Showing posts with label Funny Poetry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Funny Poetry. Show all posts

May 1, 2017

Chand raat ko sabhi daikhein hilal eid ko


Chand raat ko sabhi daikhein hilal eid ko

Ik hamara hi naseeba hadiyan turwa gaya 

Hum thay chand kay nazaray main khoye huye 

Bas achanak chand ka abaa wahan aa gaya 



Apr 30, 2017

Siyah zulf ko jo ban sanwar kay daikhtay hain


Siyah zulf ko jo ban sanwar kay daikhtay hain 
Safaid baal kahan apnay sar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai fees hai kuch uss kay baat karnay ki 
Yeh fees kya hai abhi baat kar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai log siyah faam mah'jabeeno ko 
Laga kay dhoop main chashmay nazar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai jaib main muflis bhi maal rakhtay hain 
So muflis ki bhi jaibein katar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai shouq hai un ko bhi ghurr sawari ka 
Jo door se kharray ghamzay shatar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai apni baseerat pe naaz hai unn ko 
Jo raat ko bhi ujaalay sehar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai ishq main mushkil hai matric karna 
Result kuch bhi sahi form bhar kay daikhtay hain 

Adeeb-o-shair-o-fun'kaar botay hain jo shajar 
Yeh log phall nihaan apnay shajar kay daikhtay hain 

Suna hai marnay kay baad uss ki qadar hoti hai 
So chand din kay liye hum bhi mar kay daikhtay hain 

Feb 1, 2017

Is tarah se satanay ki zaroorat kya thi


Boyfriend ki bewafai pe ik ghazal 

Is tarah se satanay ki zaroorat kya thi
Kaminay dil ko jalanay ki zaroorat kya thi

Jo nahi tha ishq to keh diya hota
Apni Aauqaat dekhanay ki zarurat kya thi

Maloom tha keh yeh khawab toot jaein gay
Manhoos phir neend main aanay ki zarurat kya thi

Ishq pe lagti rahein gi her daur main pabandi
Ek ashiq ka dil toornay ki zaroorat kya thi

Maan lo agar keh ye yaktarfa mohabbat the to phir nafsiyaati aadmi
Mujhe daikh kay muskuranay ki zaroorat kya thi

Wo haseen lagti hai lekin kitni tayari kay baad


Sent ki, kajley ki, aur ghaazey ki gulkaari kay baad
Wo haseen lagti hai lekin kitni tayari kay baad

Muddaton kay baad us ko daikh kar aisa laga
Jesay roza-daar ki haalat ho aftaari kay baad

Baandh kar sehraa nazar aaya hai youn nosha miyan
Jis tarha mujrim dikhai deta hai giriftaari kay baad

Heroine 55 baras ki ho chuken to gham nahi
Ab gulukaari karen gi wo adaa-kaari kay baad

Qaum ko baidaar ker, disco music cher kar
Jo bechari so chuki hain raag darbaari ke baad

Eid par masroor hain dono miyan biwi bhout
Ik khareedaari se pehlay, ik khareedaari kay baad

Uqd-e-sani ka maza poocha to bolay sheikh ji
Aaisay lagta hai, chicken chakkha hai tarkaari ke baad

Raah-e-ulfat ki traffic ho keh motor-way ki ho
Haadsey hotay hain shahid, taiz-raftaari kay baad

Pehlay kuch izzat thi jis da'maad ki susral main



Pehlay kuch izzat thi jis da'maad ki susral main
Ban chuka hai ab to chapraasi wohi susral main

Apnay ghar main sher tha, susral main bakri bana
Deedni hai sher-dil ki buzdili susral main

Jab susar ho pehlwan aur boxer saaley sab hi
Uff bhi kar sakta nahi phir aadmi susral main

Kiyon na wo susral kay chakkar lagaye raat din
Saaliyan jis ko milen gulfaam si susral main

Maa’en apni betiyon ki lakh tareefen karen
Chup nahi sakten per un ki khamiyan susral main

Asal main hotay nahi hain us main johar iss qadar
Jis qadar banta hai rashid her koi susral main

Types of aashiq


Types of aashiq 

Ameer aashiq 
Main bhi kharidar hoon main bhi khareedon ga
Piyar kahan bikta hai pata bata doo

Ghareeb aashiq 
Sona na chandi na koi mehal jan-e-mann 
Tugh ko main na day sakoon gaa

Jhoota aashiq 
Kal shab dekha main ne chand jharokay mein 
Uss ko kia salaam tumharay dhokay mein

Sachaa aashiq
Dil ho gaya hai tera dewana aab koi jachta nahin 
Naadan hai samaghta nahin bin teray rehta nahin

Kamyab aashiq
O kendi hai sayaan main teri yaan

Nakaam aashiq
In say nain mila kay dekho 
Yeah dhoka bhi kha kay dekho

Chalaak aashiq 
Buss bhai buss ziyada baat nahin memsaab 
Aaj kay baad mulaqat nahin memsaab

Majboor aashiq 
Izhar bhi mushkil hai kuch keh bhi nahin saktay 
Majboor hain uff allah chup rah bhi nahi saktay

Buzdil aashiq 
Main tera shehar chorr jaon ga

Dheete aashiq 
Chahay jiss shehar bhee jayen chahay jiss mulk bhee jayen 
Main hi mahiwal hoon tera sohniye tu meri gal sun ja 

Izzat daar aashiq 
Teri ruswayon say darta hoon 
Jub teray shehar se guzar taa hoon

Baagh janay ka maza jaata raha


Baagh janay ka maza jaata raha
Ghaas khanay ka maza jaata raha

Boss ne chuthi ki arzi phaar di
Girh-giraane ka maza jaata raha

Ho gaya akhir isi gull se nikah
Gull khilaanay ka maza jaata raha

Nikli begum bhi krate champion
Ghar bsaanay ka maza jaata raha

Jab se ayi hai meri qamqr main chukk
Naaz uthaanay ka maza jaata raha

Dusri bivi mili bhi tandhu
Dan'dnaanay ka maza jaata raha

Jaisay he chhitrol is ne ki
Bulbulanay ka maza jaata raha

Kuch naya kaam tujh ko karna hai



Kuch naya kaam tujh ko karna hai
Bad-ma'ashi main naam karna hai

Khoon do char tu ne ker dalay
Jaibon main noot apni bhar dalay

Taqat-e-zulm jis kay pass nahin 
Jeena duniya main us ko rass nahin 

Jis kay khoon main rachi barood ki bu
Jaanta hai woh zindigi ki kho

Jaahileeyat ka kya ye door aaya
Apnay logon pe tera zoor aaya

Bharam gherat ka to nay toor diya
Peechay zulm-e-arab ko choor diya

Kerna chahta hai kya zara to bol
Girha apni aqal ki kudh to khol

Khoon apna tu kiyon bahata hai
Kiyoon tu apna hi ghar jalata hai

Bachay sehmay huway yeh teray hain 
Tang tujh se yeh saray chehray hain


Guzray dino ki bhuli hui baat ki tarha


Guzray dino ki bhuli hui baat ki tarha

Ankhon main jaagta hai koi raat ki tarah

Tum se umeed thi keh nibhao gay dosti

Tum bhi badal gaye karachi kay halaat ki tarah

Un ki makhmoor nigahoon kay karishmay toba


Un ki makhmoor nigahoon kay karishmay toba

Pak'bazoon ko bhi mah'khaar bana detay hain

Aur pay-ba-pay zulm-o-sitm raah-e-mohabat mein qamar

Aik insaan ko fankaar bana detay hain

Jan 31, 2017

Insaan ka her ayeb chupa deti hai kursi



Insaan ka her ayeb chupa deti hai kursi 

Budhon ko bhi zee'shan bana deti hai kursi 

Shab bhar main yeh muflis ko bana deti hai zar'daar 

Soi hui kismat ko jaga deti hai kursi 

Gaoun main jo mashoor hai "gulu" kay laqb say 

Uss shaks ko gulsher bana deti hai kursi 

Woh log jo mariyaal say nazar atay hain pehlay 

Un logoun ki tawanai ko barha deti hai kursi 

Ta umer woh phir uss kay liye bharta hai aahain 

Ik baar jisay jalwa dikha deti hai kursi 

Woh log jo rehtay hain karaye kay makan main 

Bangloun main unhain la kay bitha deti hai kursi 

Gar sahib-e-kursi hai faqat  3 hi foot ka 

Uss bonay ko  6 foot ka bana deti hai kursi 

Woh log jo ek lafz ada kar nahi saktay 

Taqreer ka fun unn ko sikha deti hai kursi 

Nazdeeq nahi aata niyaz! Iss kay koi bhi 

Jiss shakhs ko ek baar gira deti hai kursi

Jan 30, 2017

Sasural se jo maikay main aati hain biwiyan


Sasural se jo maikay main aati hain biwiyan
Sau sau tarah se dhoom machati hain biwiyan

Khanay mazay mazay kay khilati hain biwiyan
Jeenay ka jo maza hai chakhaati hain biwiyan

Kuch din to khoob aish karati hain biwiyan
Phir aish kay baad khoon rulati hain biwiyan

Kuch raat din nidhal hai biwi ke waaste
Paale ye sab wabaal hai biwi ke waaste

Itnay jatan se gher me jo aati hain biwiyan
Ungli per shoher ko nachaati hain biwiyan
qaida chati ka yaad dilati hain biwiyan

Udhaar pehlay sab ka chukana chahiye tha



Udhaar pehlay sab ka chukana chahiye tha
Phir girl friend ko shopping pe le jana chahiye tha

Sun'nana zaroori thi kiya saaray jahan ki baaten?
Chai he to thi khud banana chahiye tha

Be wqat begam ko neend se na uthana chahiye tha
Maar khanay se to behtar tha kuch kaam kar letay

Bartan dho kay phir jharoo pocha lagana chahiye tha
Phir haathon se apnay khana bana'na chahiye tha

Tu takhla hai to ye hai tera bura naseeb...
Sar apna khud tum ko bachana chahiye tha

Foot ball ko to bas koi nishana chahiye tha
Begam le kay jharoo dori dostoon k peechhay

Be waqat dostoon ko dawat pe na bulana chahiye tha
Bulaya he tha to na aisay bhagana chahiye tha

Char saal se ki chating nikli 40 saal ki
Umar to usay apni batana chahiye tha

Ya jawani ka photo na dikhna chahiye tha
Udhaar pehle sab ka chukana chahiye tha
Phir girl friend ko shopping pe le jana chahiye tha


Aisi apni wife ho



Aisi apni wife ho

5' 6" jis ki height ho
Jeans jis ki tight ho
Chehara jis ka bright ho
Umar 22 se 27 ho
Aisi apni wife ho

Sadak per sab kahein kya cute ho
Bhir main sab kahe side ho
mumbai, delhi ya gujarat ki paidaish ho
Sas ki seva jis ki khwahish ho
Aisi apni wife ho

Parosi jab baat karein to haath main knife ho
Dinner kay time candle light ho
Hum main tum main kabhi na koi fight ho
Milnay kay baad dil delight ho
Yeh kavita parhne ke baad log kahein "chikne, tum right ho"
Aisi apni wife ho

Kaash yeh concept .0001 percent bhi right ho
Agar aisi apni wife ho
To kya haseen life ho

Har kisi ki yahi farmaish ho
Kudrat ki bhi aazmaaish ho
Khuda kay software mein bhi bug ki gunjaish ho
Ay kaash, kahin to ek aisi paidaish ho
Aisi apni wife ho!

Maal-o-zarr ki inteha chahta hoon


Maal-o-zarr ki inteha chahta hoon
Main bankon main kharbon rupeya chahta hoon

Election main jeetun curruption main luutun
Hakumat main ohda barra chahta hoon

Mohabbat mubarik ,muhab-e-watan ko
Dagha day kay daad-e-wafa chahta hoon

Jahan chaahon rakh dun khud apni girvi
Main shaabash aur hosla chahta hoon

Churra kay main lay jaun mulki khazaana
Tajori ka har darr khula chahta hoon

Nahi baal-e-jibril-o-baang-e-dra main
Sabak jo main seekhna chahta hoon

Teray kaan main raaz ki baat keh di 
Keh main fazl-e-rabbi khuda chahta hoon

Jiya hoon main kha kay karo'ron ki rishwat
To kya itni jaldi mra chahta hoon

Jiyun ga main jab tak karun ga hakumat
Keh is kom ka main bhala chahta hoon

Siyaasat hai meri riyaasat hai meri
Main aaba ki rasmain rwa chahta hoon

Na mazduur khush hon na dehkan razi
In;hein be-sakun dekhna chahta hoon

Nahi tuur ki raas mujh ko tajalli
Na musa hun or na Essa chahta hoon

Kaash iss eid par main tera bakra hota


Kaash iss eid par main tera bakra hota
Aur kissi nay na sahi tu nay to mujhay pakra hota

Tu hina lagay haathon say mujhay pathey khilati
Thoray thoray nahi saray akathey khilaati

Tu mujhay main main kar ke bulaati 
Aur sham ko gali main saath ghumaati

Mere pass gaari na sahi chakhra hota 
Kaash iss eid par main tera bakra hota

Tu meri sohbat par naaz karti
Bila-jhijhak mujhay aashna-e-raz karti

Agar mera raqeeb mujhe chehra karata
Seeng marta foran ussay takar karata

Raat ko sardi main bahir akra hota 
Kaash iss eid par main tera bakra hota

Phir eid par zibah ho jata main 
Teri khatir cut mar jata main

Teri mohabat nay kuch iss tarah jakra hota
Kaash iss eid par main tera bakra hota

Aaj tak woh band baja shaamiyana yaad hai


Aaj tak woh band baja shaamiyana yaad hai
Khud ko itni dhoom se sooli charhana yaad hai

Teen moqay bhi diye qazi nay ghor-o fikr kay
Aaj tak who qeemati moqay ganwana yaad hai

Aik nah kafi thi her muskil se bachnay kay liye
Hum ko han ka faislaa woh ehmaqana yaad hai

Ghar jisay laa'iye thay hum roti pakanay kay liye
Ab pakati hai humen uss ka pakana yaad hai

Na silaee janti haa na cooking maloom hai
Han ussay shohar ko ungli per nachaana yaad hai

Uss ki her ik baat per kehna hi parta hai ‘bajaa’ 
Iss tarah uss ka humen barson bajana yaad hai

Mantay hen hum husaini hadesaa hoga shadeed
Kiyon keh tum ko waqeaa itna puranaa yaad hai

Umar uss ki ho 85 to koi baat nahin


Umar uss ki ho 85 to koi baat nahin 
Ishq ka rog sha'oori bhi to ho sakta hai 

2 maheeno kay liye dhoond raha hoon uss ko 
Mera mehboob "Aboori " bhi to ho sakta hai 

عمر اسکی ہو پچاسی تو کوئی بات نہیں 
عشق کا روگ شعوری بھی تو ہو سکتا ہے 

دو مہینوں کے لیے ڈھونڈ رہا ہوں اس کو 
میرا محبوب " عبوری " بھی تو ہو سکتا ہ

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